Repressed memories and writers block
Oddly enough, I absolutely dread writing. Does anyone else get this? “Oh, I love to read and write, I wanna be a writer one day, etc, etc” but when it comes time for you to actually sit down and write something it scares you shitless. Perhaps it is only me, but I do recall reading a short piece written by an editor of National Geographic in a 1977 issue. He wrote that every author should have a cluttered house, that needed to be swept and cleaned, and have the roof fixed and the gutters repaired. That way, they would always have something to procrastinate that big writing assignment they had to finish, instead of having a neat tidy home with no obstacles between them and the chore of writing. The article even had a little cartoon that was quite funny. It made me feel better hearing those things from a National Geographic editor, so that does mean I am not the only one who both loves/hates writing, but I still feel silly for it. Which leads me to the conclusion that I must have some sort of dark repressed memory attached to writing, and it is that memory that is pushing me away from the chore of writing. Hmm…let me open the back door of my mind and see what I’ve got back there….
Oh god…no…NO! AHHHHH!!! MAKE IT STOP! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN’T SEE ANYMORE, MAKE IT STOP, MAKE IT STOP!
Whew…Okay, turns out I have many bad memories attached to writing, most of them relating to college, critical ex-girlfriends, and reading a draft written by a classmate and you suddenly realize your writing is shit and they are a god of the English language and will one day get a movie deal while you piddle away at a shitty blog.
Yeah…writing is not a game for pansies, there is much suffering.
Well that is my post for the week, I am starting to consider renaming this blog “The random musings of an angry drunk” but there may still be hope for me.